My Case Against Santa Claus

"He's making a list, checking it twice, gonna find out who's naughty or nice. Santa Claus is coming to town."

Is he? Santa doesn't come to our house. When I started a family, it didn't feel right to tell my children that Santa Claus was bringing them presents when he wasn't. So I never did.  It always seemed to take the focus off of the real reason of the season... celebrating the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. The concept is the same with the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, etc. Why pretend that what is isn't real... is?

I have always felt great about this decision, and my children have appreciated it. Unfortunately, I have run into some cultural speed bumps along the way. Many adults have said things like these to my children:
"What's Santa bringing you for Christmas?"
"If you don't believe in Santa, then he won't bring you any presents!"
"You have to be good or Santa Claus won't come!"
This is extremely confusing to my children, who know that such a scenario is not the case, but wonder why adults, who are supposed to be honest and helpful to children, would tell them so.

A bigger problem, however, is with friends of my children and their parents. When other kids start talking about Santa to them, my kids think it's silly to play along. This has created some real opposition from both children and parents. I have received multiple complaints, even "warnings".

I believe that culturally we are way off base in our current creation of Santa Claus, and other imaginary visitors. Let me explain why:

1) As I've already mentioned, a focus on Santa Claus takes the focus off Christ.

2) I subscribe to the philosophy of "Core Phase" described in A Thomas Jefferson Education by Oliver DeMille. This phase takes place from age 0-8. From the TJED website:

Core Phase is that magical time of nurture and growth, almost like a cocoon. The lessons of Core Phase are taught through work and play as a family. They are:

• right and wrong
• good and bad
• true and false
• relationships
• family values
• family routines and responsibilities
• learning accountability
• the value and love of work

During this Phase children are taught the basics of the family’s faith, and how to arrive at and recognize truth. (Italics added.)

(For more information about Core Phase, see: 

http://www.tjed.org/2011/05/homeschooling-excellence-core-phase/)

Is the Santa charade conducive to the necessary lessons of this age group? I contest that it opposes them.

3) I want my children to be able to trust me. I want to be the kind of parent that my child can say about me, "my mom would never lie to me".  As one Facebook user said, "I could be wrong, but it seems to me that telling children blatant lies and playing them up year after year won't give them as much confidence in the other 'unseen' things they are taught once they find out they were lied to."

Traditions of our Fathers

Elder Richard G. Scott of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said,

“Your Heavenly Father assigned you to be born into a specific lineage from which you received your inheritance of race, culture, and traditions. That lineage can provide a rich heritage and great reasons to rejoice. Yet you have the responsibility to determine if there is any part of that heritage that must be discarded because it works against the Lord’s plan of happiness.

“You may ask how can one determine when a tradition is in conflict with the teachings of the Lord and should be abandoned? That is not easily done. I have found how difficult it is as I work to overcome some of my own incorrect traditions. … Customs and traditions become an inherent part of us. They are not easy to evaluate objectively. Carefully study the scriptures and counsel of the prophets to understand how the Lord wants you to live. Then evaluate each part of your life and make any adjustments needed. Seek help from another you respect who has been able to set aside some deeply held convictions or traditions that are not in harmony with the Lord’s plan. …"

So are you saying that we should abolish Santa Claus? Christmas isn't Christmas without Santa!

Although we don't focus on Santa, the Jolly Old Fellow is not extinct from our Christmas cheer. We recognize him as a fun character. The kids enjoyed sitting on "Santa's" lap at our ward Christmas party and chatting with him. Imagination is great, as long as it is recognized as such!

We DO celebrate Saint Nicholas Day on December 6th. We tell the story of the great Saint and the children each receive a beautiful picture book about the upcoming holiday, Christmas!

(For more ways to celebrate, see: http://www.stnicholascenter.org/pages/how-to-celebrate/)

And of course, there are lots of fun ways to celebrate Christmas. We love reading and performing the Christmas Nativity, and exchanging gifts on Christmas day. As always, the best way to celebrate Christmas is to do something nice for someone else!

Merry Christmas, everyone! (And to all a good night!)

http://www.mormonchannel.org/video/mormon-messages?v=2874125972001&cid=HPWE121813271

"But I have commanded you to bring up your children in light and truth."
 -Doctrine and Covenants 93:40

I Am Raising Warriors

I Am Raising Warriors

by Melanie Ballard

In the beginning there was a war—a civil war.  The battles were not of gun fire, cannons, or even sword.  Yet one-third died.  Ironically, those who died did not perish by combat, but by their own will and choice.

 This war has not ended.  We battle today against an army at its full height of power and strength.

            I am raising warriors.  This is a daunting task.  To raise valiant warriors I must help them first, know their enemy, second, know their strength lies in God, third, have the training needed to win, and last and most importantly—choose to live.

            I must train my sons and daughters to know their enemy and recognize his strategies.  They must know that the war began because Satan wanted power and glory, and that he does not care for the lives of his men.  They must understand that even in the appearance of victory, Satan and his army win only increased misery—for even when companioned with power and glory, wickedness is not, and never will be, happiness.  I must teach my children how to utilize the tremendous power of the Spirit to understand the opposition.  The Spirit will decode lies, reveal truth and detect a distant and camouflaged enemy.  The Spirit’s communication is subtle and understanding its messages requires a focused mind and heart.  By knowing our foe’s devices and using the Spirit to detect them, my sons and daughters will always know who and where the enemy is.

            My sons and daughters must know that Jesus Christ is the only true source of strength.  One of the greatest keys to unlock this strength is humility—the submission of one’s will to God.  If my children can learn to submit their wills to God, they can become unified with Him and thereby obtain greater power than they could have ever possessed on their own.  Humility requires unfaltering obedience, for God will not grant strength to those who veer from his plan.  The enemy may mock these methods by preaching of independence and individualism, but warriors who follow Christ’s strategy will develop the strength to win personal battles and ultimately win the war. 

            My sons and daughters need intense preparation and schooling to lead out in the battle field. As their parents, we will oversee each step of their training.  Our tactics and methods are different than the world’s, and we will not relinquish our children’s training to it.  My children must learn wisdom not just knowledge, truth not just facts, love and service not survival of the fittest.  They must learn to love all men, yet never allow a relationship to persuade them to lower their guard. Their training must be broad and thorough. They must understand God’s expectations and plans for them, reason through false theories and alert others to Satan’s lies.  They must be inspired to lead, yet understand the sacrifice and lonely road that accompanies leadership.  Just as young children would not be sent to war, I will not risk the life of my warriors by sending them into battle without the weapons and skills they need to survive.  Fight they must—and win they will—but only when they are prepared.

            The decision to follow God is the most important piece of their entire training—I want to inspire the desire to live. The best source of inspiration is my own preparation and expertise, so it is vital that I set the example of a great warrior.  When out in the world, my children’s allegiances will be tested to the core; they must have the opportunities to decide which army they want to fight for before hand to hand combat arrives.  Home is the best place to develop and solidify allegiance to God; for within the eternal bonds of the family, parents offer love, support, redirection and the chance to try again . . . and again . . . and again.   Just as walls and guards protect soldiers from their enemies, I will guard my home from worldly influences, to prevent incorrect and damaging information from entering my children’s training before they are ready see it for what it truly is.  No other place or institution can offer such an environment.  Of all the preparation my sons and daughters will ever receive—of all the choices they will ever make—this is the most important: they must choose to live with God.  Even if they lack other training, skills, and knowledge, if their allegiance to God is cemented—they have won!

            Even though the battle intensifies, there are many who don’t even see it.  Even those who know we are at war may not realize that the battle rages around them or who they are fighting for.  God needs warriors who know the enemy is real and why they must fight, who trust His strength and follow His orders, who have been carefully prepared and who desire to win.  I am raising warriors—warriors, who choose to live.


"Now they never had fought, yet they did not fear death; and they did think more upon the liberty of their fathers than they did upon their lives; yea, they had been taught by their mothers, that is they did not doubt, God would deliver them." -Alma 56:47

Gotta admit...

I love gardening! Some women I know like to scrapbook to relieve stress. Scrapbooking makes me want to poke both of my eyes out. But give me some fairly good weather and some time in my yard, and all is right in the world.

My dad makes these beautiful wood flower pots all winter and gives me a few new ones each May with some flowers to plant for my birthday! (Yes, I realize I am L-U-C-K-Y.) I LOVE container gardening. The begonias and pansies have done especially well this year.

Flowers aren't the only thing I like to plant in containers. Here's one with a baby elderberry bush that will be transplanted to the backyard in the fall.

The tulsi plants are in smaller pots. These will be transferred to larger containers in the fall and kept inside through the winter, as they can't handle the frost. I'm trying to add to the number of medicinal plants in my yard each year. So far, I've got marshmallow and mallow, two varieties of holy basil, two beautiful lavender bushes, elderberry, calendula, red raspberry, violet, feverfew, and, of course, dandelion. (And possibly one or two I haven't identified yet!)

Only one of my original rose bushes remains (the one closest to the camera)- it's a favorite! Perhaps I might be able to harvest some rose hips in the fall.

I tried planting some lettuce and spinach in my front garden bed this year, as the back yard is under construction, and it has grown pretty well. Unfortunately, I have found that this garden bed is prone to people stepping and spitting in it, and cats playing in it and using it as a litterbox. Not cool.

The irises I recently cut back were used to decorate many family graves on Memorial Day.

I finally found a perfect place for the sandbox. Who is that adorable child playing? 

 This plant has really outdone itself this year. The flowers emit one of the best fragrances I have ever inhaled. Bees have flocked to this thing like it was their mothership. What is it? As far as I've been able to find out, it is some kind of landscaping variety of milkweed, with milky white juice that is poisonous to humans and predators. (Don't drink it!)

My potatoes are planted in the white trash cans at the end of the driveway. First year I've tried that and they are doing great! And, not the best picture, but one of my very favorite plants in the world: the wild yellow rose bush. They only bloom once a year, and the blooms are short lived. As, I am writing (end of June), the blooms have all withered and are gone. I have fond memories of picking flowers off a similar bush as a child, carrying them around with me and smelling them all day.

See? One of the best smells ever!

I really like this tree. It is almost palm-like, and I recently found out its identity- Sumac! It sends out shoots everywhere and tries to take over the world! Here is my little climber hanging out in its branches. 

Some surprise strawberries from my backyard-in-transition.

Future home of tomatoes and other delights. :)

Can't forget the flag! Happy gardening, and Happy Independence Day!

"And there were some who died with fevers, which at some seasons of the year were very frequent in the land- but not so much so with fevers, because of the excellent qualities of the many plants and roots which God had prepared to remove the cause of diseases, to which men were subject by the nature of the climate-" Alma 46:40

Father's Day 2013

 Wow. Has it really been 2 years since I've seen Alan? Yes, why, yes it has.

 We missed this little redhead! It's been 3 years since we've seen her... over half of her little life!

 Me and my handsome brothers

 Look at all those cute grandkids! Grandma and Grandpa are pretty cute, too!

 Alan gets a kiss...

 Emma is totally grossed out. 

 They're happy now. What a cute family!

 The family! (Missing Alexia, Lexie, my step-kids and grandbabies) Hi David!

Grandpa played ball when mom was too tired. I'm lucky to have a great dad! 

The family take 2! (David taking the pic this time) 

Can't wait to see Allison again!

"There is genuine concern over the diminishing role of the father in the home. His influence is fading. Presiding responsibilities formerly assumed are left either to the mother or to agencies outside the home. This diminishing role is at the root of a multitude of our problems. Numerous things go awry when the scriptural family organization is upset!

The father is the patriarch in the home. This means that the father is the presiding authority. This does not mean that he should be dictatorial. Modern scriptures set forth qualifications for all who preside:

'No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of the priesthood, only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned. …' (D&C 121:41.)"

-A. Theodore Tuttle

Real- life yoga for moms

Hi, I'm Greta, and I LOVE yoga. Of the many different exercise classes I've participated in over the years, yoga is the keeper. With the benefits including flexibility, strength, balance, and, most importantly, inner peace, you can't go wrong. And the great thing is, no special equipment is needed! I can do it all using my own body. A yoga mat is nice to have, and I've been using the same two mats for the past 10 years.

I've led a yoga class at my church for several years now. I've gained so much more than I thought possible. One of the bonuses has been having great friends to do yoga with. Here's my friend, Tani, making her way into half- moon pose.

What do you do when you have little kids and no one to babysit while you exercise? Bring them with you! Having my kids with me during yoga has been a unique experience. It's unlike any yoga class I've ever been to. I've learned much patience, and how to tune out the outer chaos and tune into the inner peace. Here are my friend Sidney and I are focusing on our squats, while my son, Noah, provides some entertainment. :)

Complete Surrender! Amidst the goldfish crackers, toys, and scattered belongings, there is still calm. Final relaxation, or corpse pose, can get a bit tricky at times, but I've found that it is the ultimate time to relax and enjoy regardless of the noise around me. The best is when I have a kid or two come and snuggle with me during final relaxion. That's vastly more rewarding than any health club yoga experience.

If you're a mom to your own kids or others, join us! Or, bring your spouse for Saturday morning Couples Anti- Nursing home yoga. :)  Namaste.


(Photos taken by Emmy Ward, age 7, with Sidney's camera.)

"And he arose, and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, Peace, be still. And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm." -Mark 4:39